Druids....?

So, last time I wrote about religion I was discussing my exploration of Wicca. I've been going to a Wicca 101 class at my local pagan temple and while it's interesting, it's interesting from a purely academic perspective. It's not what I want to do. I felt a little sad learning that, as I thought Wicca was going to be it.

After going to Wicca 101 for a couple weeks, I was fortunate enough to attend ConVocation in Dearborn, MI, last weekend. It was amazing. I had a blast, met some wonderful people, and took some awesome classes. I also had the chance to witness a ritual to honor Athena and welcome wisdom back into the world, celebrating Her birth from the forehead of Zeus, with Hephaistos wielding the axe that broke great Zeus' head open.The Ar nDraiocht Fein (ADF) ArchDruid was the one who led the Athena ritual.

Everything that the ADF ritual did spoke to me on a deep level. I was enthralled, and the husband said I was glowing after it. It was amazing. Previously that weekend, the Senior Druid for my local grove led a class on Hellenismos, the reconstructionism of the ancient Hellenic religion, and what he said made me question whether or not I wanted to continue with my current path or go back to Hellenismos. He was very frank in laying out what Hellenismos was and what it believed, and how kharis (reciprocity) was very important, which is something I truly believe in and can get behind.

That class, coupled with the Athena rite, have decided it for me. At least for the present, I am going back to Hellenismos. I am going to work tomorrow to develop a practice that I can do at home, and instead of following a dogmatic ritual that someone else set up, I will research and write my own.... or at least, use some language from Homer and the Orphic Hymns. I will do the work this time, rather than just taking a ritual and saying it.

I need to write a series of daily prayers, one for morning and evening, as well as a blessing for meals... lots of prayers to write! I also need to structure what I'm going to do according to the ancient Hellenic month. Perhaps I'll throw it in my Witches Datebook and make note of what happens when in there. Lots to do!

Back to Druids for a moment. I think I'm going to join ADF. I went to their coffee hour this week to meet up with them and see what they are like. They're nice people! I was very nervous going in to Olga's to meet up with them and I was able to have dinner with three of the Druids, before going down the plaza for tea with more people. It was a nice evening, everyone was incredibly sweet to me. They seemed genuinely interested in what I had to say and liked my set of Greek Alphabet Oracle tiles that I made.

Greek Alphabet Oracle

Well, that's a lot of information for one night. I'm exhausted and I'm going to crash. Good evening, folks.

Farewell, 

Lyssa

My Stay at a Psychiatric Hospital

I'm getting tired of telling this story so I'm writing it down. This way I can just hand out the link and not have to say it again.
Last Tuesday the 26th of January, I went to do intake paperwork at a new therapy place I was going to. I had been having suicidal thoughts and was quite scared, as this wasn't the first time this has happened. My nurse practitioner who prescribes my psych meds recommended I get back into therapy and this place was right around the corner. The intake specialist said I scored high on the suicide risk assessment form and strongly recommended I go to their "urgent care" for mental health, the Psychiatric Intervention Center or PIC.
On this specialist's recommendation, Wednesday night I checked into PIC and found out that it wasn't an urgent care, it was a crisis center. The doctor there - I saw a nurse, a doctor, and a social worker all in a span of about ten hours - didn't care about my symptoms or what complaints I had, he was more interested in checking a box on a form and sending me to a hospital. He even lied on my form - perhaps he misunderstood but I'm going to hang on to my anger until proven otherwise - and said that I had attempted suicide when I only had thoughts.
All of this ended up putting me in StoneCrest Behavioral Center. I was there Thursday - Saturday. There were no visiting hours while I was in there, so I missed my husband terribly. I was able to use the phone but it was a communal phone, in public, that had to be limited to ten minutes a patient at a time. The food was terrible, the oatmeal wasn't oatmeal but gruel, and they didn't care about your food preferences until you reminded them the third time that you don't eat fish.
I was scared for my physical safety. The other patients - they put me on a crisis ward full of violent and potentially dangerous patients - were scary. My roommate the first night bragged about almost stabbing her boyfriend. I almost had a chair thrown at me; I ran quick.
The good thing was that at StoneCrest, the staff was wonderful. The nurses and mental health assistants (basically orderlies) all were of one mind: you shouldn't be here. Some thought I should be discharged immediately, some thought they should move me to a less crisis-laden floor, but all were under the assumption that I wouldn't stay long.
I didn't. I was home by Saturday afternoon. I got to see my husband and see my kitties. I missed him so dearly, and the fuzzbuckets too. The doctor I was assigned to was very good at recognizing I didn't need to be there and got me home quick.
This makes me question how honest to be with therapists in the future. I signed myself willingly into the hospital, but it was under major duress. They told me that if I didn't, they could get a court order if the doctor felt it was necessary. I don't know whether or not to keep going back to the place that runs PIC, as they were the ones who locked me up, but I know I need help.
So that's my eventful week. I hope you all had a more restful end of January than I did.
<3, Lyssa